21 Days

They say it takes 21 days to build a habit. When I graduated high school I got healthy. I had so much willpower and strength. Then I got into a crappy relationship, I turned to my comfort food, not to mention I had a kid. When I got out of that relationship, I was starting to get healthy again. Then I fell backwards. Like many people do. Well last year about February I built a habit. I was doing well, eating well, losing my extraness. I lost 15 pounds and then one day I just fell right off that wagon. I don't know what happen. I gave up. Normally giving up or staying on track with things is not hard for me. I am very focused and dedicated to kids, work, husband. I want everything to be just right for them. I am goal oriented, I know this, its how I succeed at the things I do. The one flaw I have, is I tend to not focus on myself and making time to make me healthy and working out(which I do like) when it comes to being healthy I just can't keep on the
"wagon". I am really smart and knowledgeable about what will work and what won't work. But for some reason it just is the one thing that is so difficult for me. Its really a matter of doing and not just talking or thinking about it. I have realized that I need support when it comes to this. Someone who is not going to be lenient about the getting healthy life style. I need someone to call me out if they see me slipping, someone who is not afraid to hurt my feelings. Don't sugar coat things. In my head and heart I really want to be healthy and like who I am and feel okay. Right now today I don't like myself. I mean, I do like myself, I just don't like the image of my being. Don't get me wrong please, it is not about being stick thin, or picture perfect. That is not what I am after. I am after being healthy, being able to know, that I am taking care of myself. This is what I plan to do in 2009. I guess you can say this is like a new years resolution. But the thing about new years resolution is that, most people don't follow through, I plan to follow through on this for once in my life. But I know for a FACT, I can't do this alone. I need help, support, encouragement, and a strong tongue. The strong tongue is what I need the most. Get me moving, get me eating healthy! That is my goal.

Here are my downfalls:

• Sweets
• Eating late
• portion size
• eating out
• eating late
• exercise

Here is my goal aka what I AM going to do!!:

• Cut back drastically on sweets
• smaller portion sizes
• no eating late
• walking on treadmill daily in the morning
• being more active
• not eating out in excess
• keep track of what I am eating

Happy 2009 to being healthy!